After Fede Valverde and Aurelien Tchouameni came to blows in an ugly locker room fight, the wheels are fully flying off the dilapidated, disease ridden bus with cushions chewed out of it that is the 2025/26 Real Madrid season.
Every single report sheds light on an infected abscess that has grown to be so large that it cannot possibly be ignored - let alone drained. Real Madrid have become an embarrassment, and after Florentino Perez threw Xabi Alonso under the bus instead of addressing the real issues, the Spanish manager sits there vindicated as even the friendly Alvaro Arbeloa can only sit an watch these petulant children tank his reputation.
Alonso remarked in a moment of frustration that he felt coaching Real Madrid was like a nursery. Though he was potentially wrong about which players were the biggest problem, perhaps he (or we) was actually only minimizing the extent of the rot.
Real Madrid players are turning to their parents now
According to a new report from COPE, via the Madrid Zone, the Real Madrid locker room is so infantile that like parents of misbehaving children in an elementary school, apparently the parents of two players actually called Florentino Perez - the literal president of this club - to complain about why their children are not playing enough and should be playing more.
The players of these parents should be embarrassed about this. If they cannot deal with not playing enough, then they should either play better or talk to the manager and the president themselves instead of enlisting their parents to do so. And if the parents did it out of their own volition, that is another matter entirely, though it does prove Xabi Alonso lamenting how his squad are like a nursery right times 100.
Real Madrid fans will speculate as to which players had their parents call the school offices to scream tomato red in the face about their precious little angels not playing. Jude Bellingham's parents were famously kicked out of the Borussia Dortmund locker room for being brats about Jobe rightfully not getting minutes. And we all know how Kylian Mbappe's entourage is. But it could really be anyone. Alvaro Carreras is another candidate. Imagine if someone older like Dani Carvajal or Dani Ceballos had their parents acting like this. That's funny to picture.
But no matter who it was or was not, it is embarrassing and impossible for any manager to navigate a squad like this. Real Madrid really may need a crazy disciplinarian like Jose Mourinho to antaognize some of these little boys into getting their act together.
